SMILE
Because life is beautiful.
A couple of years ago I arranged a day at the races with 2 different groups of friends – my best friend K1 & all her girls and my best friend B, some of our girls & B’s older brother.
K1 picked us up as we were close to the race course and off we went. In the car was K1, myself, B, B’s brother who is also, confusingly a B, so we’ll call him BB and T, one of K1’s best friends.
On the way there, T was saying that she actually thought horse racing was cruel blah blah blah, B & BB were just looking at me going ‘Ermm…’ (Because we were all thinking ‘Well if you think its so fucking cruel then what are you doing going to the races and effectively supporting such cruelty, you twat?’ ) and when she finally stopped, I said “So I guess now isn’t the right time to mention that B & BB’s parents own racehorses then….”
Dead silence.
K1 cracked up and T started apologising, B & BB are both clearly much nicer people then me because they started assuring her that it was OK. Once she’d recovered from the embarrassment and K1 and I had stopped snickering, we all went off and met up with the others.
We all had a lovely day – much drink was taken (and spilt or drunk), many bets were placed (I don’t care what you say, picking them by the name DOES work), some money won, some money lost, flirtations were flirted and there was even some number exchanged…
Fast forward to approx 4 weeks ago and BB & T got married.
Needless to say K1 was one of the bridesmaids. I know its bad form to say it, but she did look more beautiful then the bride - although to be fair, I’ve seen K1 when she’s dying of flu and she still looked beautiful – who the hell else do you know who can do that? B was not a bridesmaid but she also looked breath-taking. T looked lovely (she’s dyed her hair dark & I really think the blonde suited her better but oh well), the dress was tasteful (lets face it – it could have been a disaster), everything looked lovely and the day was wonderful according to all reports.
I have sifted through the pics on the photographers website and am now feeling all homesick again, not to mention very nostalgic.
When BB & T met, B & I had not had the huge argument that has caused a bit of a chasm in our friendship that we are still struggling to fully repair, K1 & I were 2 years younger and a whole lot more innocently certain of where we were going – she was about to finish uni & I had just shifted business area’s and was enjoying my new job & certain that cheating ex would now leave me alone, C had just split from her ex-husband but was finally happy about it and had finally decided that she didn’t want to be with someone who treated her the way he did, A was finally moving on with her life from her broken relationship and her son was happy and healthy, MS & AS were in the final throes of wedding plans, 2 of my friends had not yet been diagnosed with HIV, AL, at the age of 23 was still in remission from breast cancer, SS was still engaged to her now ex fiancée, J & JB were still together and were happy, my sister had just had her second child and I was totally in love with the amazing little person who had just come into the world and my brother and his wife were expecting their first child.
And that’s just what was happening within a couple of weeks either side of that day.
Sometimes, I get so caught up in life that I forget to stop and realise just how many amazing things are happening around me – I forget to savour the experience because there is so much to see and do and places to go and things to organise, work to be done and play to be played as hard as you possibly can – or rather, as hard as I possibly can…
Looking back over the last 2 years I wonder just how much I’ve missed. Things that I didn’t pay enough attention to at the time, words that were spoken without due consideration and moments that have been irretrievably lost not only to time but to memory.
Looking at just some of the differences now – B & I are still trying to find our balance again – the fact that we both want to helps, as neither of us wants to walk away from 15 years of love, friendship and wholehearted support due to a stupid misunderstanding. K1 is teaching now and loving her job but financially is in a precarious position and romantically is in a wilderness of her own confusion. C is in a new relationship that is of course not without its issues but ultimately is what she and her partner wants, C’s ex husband is now happily settled in a new relationship and they share amicable custody of their child who is growing to be a happy, well adjusted and much loved little boy. A is much happier and while I do not believe that she will end up in a relationship anytime soon, she is happy to devote herself to her son for the time being, MS & AS are eagerly awaiting the birth of their first child and of my 2 friends with HIV, one is about to start taking medication, the other is doing well enough that they still don’t need to take anything yet. AL is fighting cancer once again but she is a fighter and she’s determined to win – ‘never say die’ is her motto. Her courage humbles me. SS is here in London with me and happier then I think I have ever seen her. J is still adjusting to life without JB and JB is moving on. My sister is well and her children are growing into beautiful little girls who promise to be as beautiful, smart and as brave as their mother… not to mention just as feisty. My brother and his wife are well and their little girl is growing up to be a true daughter of theirs – smart and very very stubborn!
As for me… I’m still here.
And a whole lot happier then I was.
A couple of years ago I arranged a day at the races with 2 different groups of friends – my best friend K1 & all her girls and my best friend B, some of our girls & B’s older brother.
K1 picked us up as we were close to the race course and off we went. In the car was K1, myself, B, B’s brother who is also, confusingly a B, so we’ll call him BB and T, one of K1’s best friends.
On the way there, T was saying that she actually thought horse racing was cruel blah blah blah, B & BB were just looking at me going ‘Ermm…’ (Because we were all thinking ‘Well if you think its so fucking cruel then what are you doing going to the races and effectively supporting such cruelty, you twat?’ ) and when she finally stopped, I said “So I guess now isn’t the right time to mention that B & BB’s parents own racehorses then….”
Dead silence.
K1 cracked up and T started apologising, B & BB are both clearly much nicer people then me because they started assuring her that it was OK. Once she’d recovered from the embarrassment and K1 and I had stopped snickering, we all went off and met up with the others.
We all had a lovely day – much drink was taken (and spilt or drunk), many bets were placed (I don’t care what you say, picking them by the name DOES work), some money won, some money lost, flirtations were flirted and there was even some number exchanged…
Fast forward to approx 4 weeks ago and BB & T got married.
Needless to say K1 was one of the bridesmaids. I know its bad form to say it, but she did look more beautiful then the bride - although to be fair, I’ve seen K1 when she’s dying of flu and she still looked beautiful – who the hell else do you know who can do that? B was not a bridesmaid but she also looked breath-taking. T looked lovely (she’s dyed her hair dark & I really think the blonde suited her better but oh well), the dress was tasteful (lets face it – it could have been a disaster), everything looked lovely and the day was wonderful according to all reports.
I have sifted through the pics on the photographers website and am now feeling all homesick again, not to mention very nostalgic.
When BB & T met, B & I had not had the huge argument that has caused a bit of a chasm in our friendship that we are still struggling to fully repair, K1 & I were 2 years younger and a whole lot more innocently certain of where we were going – she was about to finish uni & I had just shifted business area’s and was enjoying my new job & certain that cheating ex would now leave me alone, C had just split from her ex-husband but was finally happy about it and had finally decided that she didn’t want to be with someone who treated her the way he did, A was finally moving on with her life from her broken relationship and her son was happy and healthy, MS & AS were in the final throes of wedding plans, 2 of my friends had not yet been diagnosed with HIV, AL, at the age of 23 was still in remission from breast cancer, SS was still engaged to her now ex fiancée, J & JB were still together and were happy, my sister had just had her second child and I was totally in love with the amazing little person who had just come into the world and my brother and his wife were expecting their first child.
And that’s just what was happening within a couple of weeks either side of that day.
Sometimes, I get so caught up in life that I forget to stop and realise just how many amazing things are happening around me – I forget to savour the experience because there is so much to see and do and places to go and things to organise, work to be done and play to be played as hard as you possibly can – or rather, as hard as I possibly can…
Looking back over the last 2 years I wonder just how much I’ve missed. Things that I didn’t pay enough attention to at the time, words that were spoken without due consideration and moments that have been irretrievably lost not only to time but to memory.
Looking at just some of the differences now – B & I are still trying to find our balance again – the fact that we both want to helps, as neither of us wants to walk away from 15 years of love, friendship and wholehearted support due to a stupid misunderstanding. K1 is teaching now and loving her job but financially is in a precarious position and romantically is in a wilderness of her own confusion. C is in a new relationship that is of course not without its issues but ultimately is what she and her partner wants, C’s ex husband is now happily settled in a new relationship and they share amicable custody of their child who is growing to be a happy, well adjusted and much loved little boy. A is much happier and while I do not believe that she will end up in a relationship anytime soon, she is happy to devote herself to her son for the time being, MS & AS are eagerly awaiting the birth of their first child and of my 2 friends with HIV, one is about to start taking medication, the other is doing well enough that they still don’t need to take anything yet. AL is fighting cancer once again but she is a fighter and she’s determined to win – ‘never say die’ is her motto. Her courage humbles me. SS is here in London with me and happier then I think I have ever seen her. J is still adjusting to life without JB and JB is moving on. My sister is well and her children are growing into beautiful little girls who promise to be as beautiful, smart and as brave as their mother… not to mention just as feisty. My brother and his wife are well and their little girl is growing up to be a true daughter of theirs – smart and very very stubborn!
As for me… I’m still here.
And a whole lot happier then I was.
posted by Giggleworthy @ 10:37 AM
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