2006 London Girls Catalogue

Important Information

While we are not the only manufacturer of London Girls, we are the number one provider for this country. Our factory produces a limited but comprehensive range due to the sheer volume that we have to produce to maintain the current population. Listed below are the basic models and the standard features, as well as the personalised options available through our mail order service.

Please call our sales department to discuss any special needs or questions you may have however please note that custom work is not available at this time.

Pictures of each model are also available on our website www.inbreedsrus


Ordering

Orders may also be placed through our website or by calling our friendly sales department. Our call centre is open 24 hours a day – just like our girls legs!


Basic models –
Small
Medium
Large


Standard Features –
Appalling teeth
Pancake foundation (The ‘laid on with a trowel’ look)
Porn star style frosted makeup
Orange fake tan (***This month only – free visible tan lines!)
Overly plucked eyebrows
Vacant expression
Poor skin condition / acne daubed with poorly matched concealer.


Hair Variations –
Dark Hair – long and in need of smoothing serum
Dark Hair – short and in need of a cut
Bottle blonde hair – cheap extensions and over-processed
Bottle blonde hair – cheap extensions, over-processed and inch long regrowth (over 80% of all models produced include this feature)

Accents are available in –
Cockney
Scottish
Irish
Irish Lite
Would-be-if-they-could-be ‘Posh’ English

Sartorial Styles

Your model will be dressed exclusively from (choose one)–
Top Shop
H & M
Jane Norman
Monsoon

And her particular ‘look’ will be either –
Skank
Ho
Slut
Polyester
Too tight

Personality Types –
Snobby bitch
Stupid bitch
Slutty bitch
Miserable Cow


As an added bonus, if you order today we will include a child – free of charge !!! That’s right! If you place your order today, your model will come with its very own baby !!!!

That’s gotta be better then a set of steak knives, right?



Disclaimer - Now I should probably mention that not ALL English girls are like this - just a lot of them... or a lot of the ones that I saw walking round Leicester Square on Sat night were anyway.... And this is really the result of an almost-run-in with a bottle blonde on Sat night whose head I really wanted to rip off but I didn't feel like making a scene in public and I was out to have a good time, not perform a community service - so instead, I'm spewing bile in my little corner of the blog world.

It’s clearly time for me to come home.